I’m not a naturally forgiving person.
When my feelings are hurt, my immediate response is to reach for my metaphorical machete – not because I want to cut a bih (not a natural fighter either) but because I want the other person to clearly understand my intention, which can be summed up with “Get the fuck away from me!”.
Some people try to pull the other party closer; their instinct is to reach across the divide to reconnect and realign the relationship. I have no idea what that’s like.
I do not ease into softness and second chances. I harden. I pull up the drawbridge to my castle and delete your number. I’m done so fast.
And let’s be realistic – there is enormous power in our “No”.
A strong, boundaried response can be healthy and serving and it’s helped me in a ton of situations, so I’m not throwing away my machete. AT ALL.
But the world would probably be a better place if that feisty blade spent more time in her sheath and less time being wielded in these streets. 🤺
This is one of the most important things I’m working on.
Holding onto my high standards (because I’ll never apologize for them) while also giving humans more grace to be human.
Boundaries and compassion.
Discernment and empathy.
It’s complicated as shit, and most days, the urge to revert to my machete moves is the loudest voice in the room. But this is a fight we should all be fighting.
Because cultivating kindness instead of doubling down on exclusion and rejection is what we came here for.
But mostly… because love.