I’m cool in a crisis. I cruise through conflict and emergencies with a level, clear head.
But the minute I sense that someone I respect thinks poorly of me, the second I think they’re doubting my intellect, my attractiveness, my savvy, my integrity… I’m a heap. I buckle like a kick to the back of the knee. Staying in everyone’s good graces has been my life’s Achille’s heel. It’s a wound I’m still working on healing.
When I’ve noticed myself getting sucked into the abyss of people pleasing, these mantras have helped me break through the waves of anxiety and speak the truth that gets me back into my heart:
- They don’t own my worthiness. My worth lives in me.
- I don’t need their approval. My choices are valid because they are mine.
- It’s not my job to change their opinion of my intelligence, beauty, potential.
- I take back the power I’ve given to their assessment of who I am.
- Even with all the mistakes I’ve made, I’m still a good heart.
- I’m turning my attention to the people who see (and love) the real me.
- I’ve made too much of my life about what they want. It’s time for what I want.
- I’ve spent years ignoring how valuable I am. Today, I promise to never ignore my value again.
- (speaking to your heart) I’m sorry for valuing other people more than you. That stops now.
- I’m done with denying myself in order to please other people.
- No matter what they think, this decision is true for me, and that’s what matters.
Until next time, I’m sending you love and courage as you unhook from the beliefs and people that aren’t good for you.