You are NOT your past. (or: Why I stopped coaching 4 years ago and why I’m starting again.)

4 years ago, I launched my first coaching business. I immediately hated it.

My clients were kind, smart people, and I dreaded our calls.

Why?

Because I was coaching the way my coach told me to. I was coaching the way a Masters in Business and the International Coach Federation had taught me to. Because I was coaching from a head full of should’s, instead of a heart that wants soul, straight talk and the occasional penis joke.

So I shut the coaching thing down and swore I’d never do it again.

Fast forward a few years and a different coach asked me: “Annika, what’s the deal? People are constantly asking to coach with you. Why do you keep saying no?”

What are you afraid of?

I was afraid that one jacked coaching season would make all coaching experiences for the rest of my life unsatisfying. (Translation: If it went badly before, it’s destined to go badly now, right?)

I was afraid that my “follow the rules” approach back then would creep in again and I’d get sucked into styling my sessions in a way that felt forced and b-o-r-i-n-g. (Translation: If I made mistakes before, I’m doomed to make those same mistakes again, right?)

But holy hell, all those fears were based on the faulty logic that my old self is in charge of my current self; that my old self should be making the decisions for my future self – when clearly, my old self needs to stop talking and just eat another cupcake.

It’s an insult to your divine power and unlimited creativity to say that you are destined to repeat your past. And you know it. You know it.

You can change.

The people around you can change – either their behavior, or they can change by literally getting out and making room for new hearts.

What do you want to change?
What old thing are you done-done-done, all the damn way DONE with?
What do you want to feel now?
What do you want to experience next?
Who do you want to share it all with?

You can start fresh. Now.

One of my fresh starts: I’m designing a coaching program I’m pumped about, and when it’s ready, I will be uber clear when describing what it is (and what it is not), so that it only resonates with people who are a true fit – for the work and for me.

What will your fresh start look like? Whether your ‘thing’ is a business idea, a ho-hum relationship, your vibe with your body, or your habit of compulsive people-pleasing, you can change it. You can reclaim your Truth and enact new definitions. You can make (and follow through on) powerful declarations about what’s staying and what needs to go.

Your old self is not in charge – if you say so.
Your old self isn’t running the show anymore – if you say so.

Releasing those patterns might take time and deep work. And you can do it.

You are not trapped by the choices you made before, the people you dated, or the opportunities you skipped and the ones you dove into. You can start fresh.

Start fresh.